Most couples are convinced that if they could change that one irritating thing that their partner does (or two or three) then they would be perfectly happy in their marriage. The truth is that the problem is not our partner, most of the time marital problems can be repaired by our hearts changing. The greatest struggle in marriage is not the flaws of our partner, it is overcoming our own flaws.
Even if we were to put all our effort into fixing ourselves and our marriages, we would still come up short. We cannot do it on our own. Luckily, we don't have to. As we submit our will to our Heavenly Father, we ask Him to make up the difference. He then heals our hearts. He enables us to act more charitably and with grace and humility. He strengthens even the weakest among us, even the weakest marriages, and helps us to see our partner as He does.
This may sound easy but it isn't. We are weak and selfish humans. Our natural human instinct is to fight against unselfish Christlike love. One of my favorite quotes is from President Gordon B. Hinckley, he said,
I like it because it's real. Its not the flowery, fluffy romantic nonsense that one might find in the words of a song or portrayed in a movie. Love is unselfish concern for someone other than oneself, period. That may not be what a new couple wants to hear but it is how their love will continue to grow and deepen.
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